You Have 5 New Messages
by Proper.English
Summary: In honor of eleven cast members of Sherlock BBC; Happy Birthday! -Rated T for implied hetero/homo sex- John, Mycroft, Moriarty, Anthea, Molly, Sally, Mrs. Hudson, Greg, Anderson, Sherlock, Irene. -implied Mystrade- *wink*
1. Military Man

1.

_Come to Cold Harbor Lane, when convenient._

_SH_

John read the text, saw the time, and decided – today- he wasn't going to listen to Sherlock. It's a personal day.

2

_Remind my brother that this IS of national importance._

_MH_

It's not that he doesn't care nor that he doesn't tell Sherlock; it's just that Sherlock is like a kid, in one ear out the other. John typed back:

_Fewer appointments if you lay off the sugar._

_JW_

3.

_He's gone off again. Think you could get a hold of him? Found a lead._

_GL_

Delete. "Sherlock quit shooting the wall! Lestrade found a lead." Lestrade had great timing.

4.

_Even if inconvenient, come anyway._

_SH_

Not happening. He's finally got a hot date and he's not ditching her. Gay he is not.

5.

_Happy Birthday John!_

_HW_

_Happy Birthday John!_

_GL_

_Happy Birthday John!_

_MH_

_Happy Birthday John!_

_MollyH_

_Happy Birthday John._

_SH_

_P.S. 2657 Maple Ave. Triple murder!_


	2. Government Man

1.

_So how many have you out lived now?._

_JM_

He still wonders why Moriarty continually texts him. Sherlock was in Berlin; surely Moriarty would follow. Bloody consulting criminals!

2

_Sir, Dr. Watson is away from Sherlock._

_A_

Time to dig into Sherlock's life. That's always so much fun, riling the sociopath up.

3.

_The one time I call you don't answer!_

_Text me back!_

_SH_

He had his mouth full. And his mobile phone was left in his pants…in the living room. So of course he didn't answer, didn't care to either. "Oh God, Mycroft!"

4.

_I'm not busy, how about you?_

_GL_

He called Anthea and told her to clear his schedule for the day; not exceptions. He was taking his first personal day.

5.

_Happy Birthday Mycroft!_

_JW_

_Happy Birthday Mycroft!_

_MollyH_

_Happy Birthday Sir._

_A_

_Happy Birthday Babe!_

_GL_

_Happy Birthday Myc._

_SH_


	3. Con Man

1.

_I'm really sorry about Sherlock._

_He's not a people person really._

_I'll call you later._

_Molls_

And so the game begins.

2.

_What's a girl to do to get a guy like you?_

_IA_

_Bring the appetizers._

_I've got dessert._

_Let's have dinner._

_JM_

3.

_Tracked her down to Karachi._

_Shall I let them finish her off?_

_Or shall I?_

_Moran_

He contemplated his next move. Irene or Sherlock….Sherlock is more fun.

_I need you here._

_Prepare for the next round._

_JM_

4.

_You lose you bastard._

_Sherlock lives, name clear._

_While you rot in the ground._

_JW_

5.

_Happy Birthday Jim!_

_Molls_

_Happy Birthday Moriarty._

_Cabbie_

_Happy Birthday Mr. Moriarty._

_IA_

_Happy Birthday Mr. Moriarty._

_Moran_

_Happy Birthday JM!_

_SH_

_P.S. Why did you tell me your birthday?_

_It makes no sense._


	4. Secretary Woman

1.

_You don't answer you phone calls._

_Duly noted._

_MH_

Maybe she should have put Master Degree in Mindless Texting on her resume. Took him four months to figure that she prefers text.

2

_Any progress on you game?_

_GL_

Only Greg seemed to understand the joys of Angry Birds and Word Play.

_Playing the new seasonal level._

_A_

3.

_It's been a while Ms. Anthea._

_Let's have dinner._

_IA_

_It has indeed. When and Where?_

_A_

4.

_Could you get Mycroft? Sherlock's gotten into trouble and only Mycroft can get him out. Please and Thanks._

_JW_

5.

_Happy Birthday Anthea!_

_JW_

_Happy Birthday Ann!_

_GL_

_Happy Birthday Miss Anthea._

_SD_

_Happy Birthday Lisa._

_MH_

_Happy Birthday Doll._

_IA_


	5. Pathologist Woman

1.

I need you to pull out John Doe again.

SH

With a sigh she looped back to the morgue. Another long night to prepare for. At least Sherlock will be there. Right?

2.

I need your help. Barts. Now.

SH

Five in the morning and her day off. She really needs a life…and more friends. And come to think of it maybe a real boyfriend.

3.

I want you - asjkdhfaso hgaioerughaskfh.

SH

That's not a misleading text _at all_. Must have gotten into a fight with the skull on the mantle again. Sigh.

4.

You do realize that you mean

a lot to him right?

JW

No, I don't; not really anyway. "You've always counted." Right?

5.

Happy Birthday Ms. Pathologist.

JM

Happy Birthday Doll

IA

Happy Birthday Ms. Hooper.

GL

Happy Birthday Molly.

JW

Happy Birthday Dear.

SH

The one time of the year where Sherlock _has_ to be nice to Molly Hooper.


	6. Police Woman

1.

I see you've foregone the bed again..

SH

Freak.

2.

Longer skirts can be useful.

SA

Oh god. Please don't let her know how my knees got so bad. I'm going to _kill_ him.

3.

Think you can help Anderson take the shots of the crime scene today?

GL

Working with him for the case; Were there butterflies in her stomach again?

4.

I'm thinking Teacher/Student Taboo?

What do you say Ms. Donavon?

StudMuffin

I say detention Tony Anderson.

;D

5.

Happy Birthday.

MollyH

Happy Birthday.

GL

Cheers Sally!

JW

Cheers.

SH

Happy Birthday Baby!.

StudMuffin


	7. Land Lady

1.

Don't forget to switch your soothers.

JW

Unread.

2.

Suziedoll you should come visit me and Henry.

Your boys will be fine.

Roxanne

Unread. Still haven't met Henry.

3.

Watch out, Mrs. Hudson. Sherlock's in a mood.

JW

Unread.

4.

This is Lestrade. I heard about the Americans.

Just wanted to ask; are you alright?

GL

Unread. But it would have been sweet to know.

5.

Happy Birthday Mrs. H!

MollyH

Happy Birthday Suzie!

Roxanne & Henry

Happy Birthday Mrs. Hudson.

MH & GL

Happy Birthday Mrs. Hudson!

JW

Happy Birthday Mrs. Hudson.

SH

John peered at Mrs. Hudson as she grew frustrated. "Mrs. Hudson, is everything all right?" She gave a heaved sigh in defeat. "Roxie, my niece, sent me this blasted thing. I can't even figure out how to unlock it." John proceeded to teach Mrs. Hudson how to work her mobile phone.


End file.
